[ god, he's fucking trying here, but when she tells him to forget it and turns her back on him, ready to leave, he panics. fuck. he always fucks things up. without fail he always fucks things up. and that should be the end of it. he should just let it go and it'll blow over and she wont care in a day or two.
but hell. why not fuck it up more? why not go all the way? ]
[ he knows if he tells her, it's going to change everything between them. it'll make things even more awkward and uncomfortable. that's why he tried so fucking hard to change the subject earlier.
but of course he failed, and now he's stuck, and he doesn't really want to lie to her face. ]
You.
[he can feel his heart jump into his throat when he says it, and his stomach is all knots now. he doesn't even look at her. he can't, or he might burst out in fucking tears or something disgustingly embarrassing like that, and he's already at his limit.]
I like you. I like you a lot, like... I have feelings for you and I'm so fucking sorry. I know you're with Hank and you're older than me and so fucking far outta my league, which isn't even the point, but it doesn't matter, ok? I'm not gonna do anything or say anything and we can still just be friends, right? I swear to fucking god that's all I wanna be, okay?
Dawn can only stand there in silence for a moment while her brain tries to come to terms with what Jason just admitted, the more she thinks about it though the more it kind of makes sense and she suddenly feels like the worst person in the world because all this time she had just been trying to form a fun friendship with Jason and now she's worried that she somehow led him on.
She also feels vaguely annoyed at Dick because she knows he would probably say 'i told you so' if he found out about this, he even mentioned that she should be careful to not encourage Jason's flirtatious nature too much.]
[ their friendship has been good and fun, and he's trying to tell her that none of this is her fault. she didn't lead him on, he's just a terrible fucking person and somewhere between all her kindness and all of their ridiculous flirting he started to really like her, more and more and god, what a shitty guy thing to do. ]
I know. I'm sorry. I wasn't gonna say anything and I really didn't want to, but you know me. I did a shitty job at not being a shitty person and now I fucked it all up.
Anyway that's all it is so don't think it's you, alright? I'm really grateful that you've been trying so hard with me and I just wanna say thanks. Thanks for trying. I'm gonna leave you the fuck alone now. Sorry.
[he keeps his arms crossed tight around himself as he moves past her quickly and practically bolts off to his room. he wonders if he can talk Dick into letting him go to Detroit with him cause he doesn't think he can stay here right now. he knows he should give Dawn some space.]
[Is all she gets to say before he bolts from the kitchen towards his room and she swears under her breath and stands in the kitchen alone for a moment.
Jason. Jason has feelings for her.
It seems so wild to her, especially because she was pretty sure it was Dick he had a crush on, but maybe it's both of them now. Then again, maybe it's not so bizarre once you think about it. There's not really a lot of them in this place and they see one another every day, sometimes in tight workout clothes, and it's not like she's some hideous old crone like she jokes about being.]
Hrm.
[She says and goes into the lower cupboard where she knows Donna has stashed a bottle of red wine, she then grabs two wine glasses and heads down to Jason's room. Because she'll be damned if she's gonna have this next conversation entirely sober.]
[ whether he can leave or not, Jason grabs his bag and throws it on his bed, feeling his hot tears finally pushing their way out of him. he wipes at them angrily, then goes to put his music on, desperately wanting to drown his thoughts out.
it's fine. it's fine. he'll just stay away from her for a while and get over his stupid feelings and then maybe she'll feel comfortable enough to wanna be around him again, even if it won't be like before.
everything was so good with her and he fucked it all up. he's so angry at himself for telling her. he couldn't even handle keeping it to himself. he's such a piece of shit.
he grabs some of his clothes off the floor and shoves them into his bag before yanking his hoodie off his chair to pull it on. he knows Dick probably isn't even leaving tonight but he just wants to be ready for when he is. ]
[She hears the music, an obvious sign that she should keep out and away, but instead of walking past his room she knocks on the door. When it's obvious he doesn't hear it, she tries again but louder.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 05:27 am (UTC)Well unless you know someone with a good chili recipe then looking one up online is our only option....
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 05:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 05:46 am (UTC)[She says and cracks open a bottle of sparkling water.]
Whatever you'd prefer.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 05:48 am (UTC)Let me know when he leaves, I guess. I'm sure he won't bother telling me.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 05:53 am (UTC)He might not even bother telling me, but yes, I'll let you know when the coast is clear for the chili dog feast to begin.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 06:03 am (UTC)But we can also just get pizza and burgers or whatever the fuck else everyone wants. I don't really care.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 06:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 06:17 am (UTC)[he shrugs, then pushes off the counter, flexing his fingers before he slides his hands into his pockets.]
Seriously it's cool.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 06:27 am (UTC)We can take your bike.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 06:31 am (UTC)[god forbid he'd worry. but now he is a little, cause he won't let this go, and he sighs to himself, dragging his fingers through his hair.]
Sure. Maybe later this week or something.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 06:44 am (UTC)Nevermind, forget it.
[She picks up the bottle of water she took out and turns to leave the kitchen, feeling irritated at herself and the situation.]
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 06:50 am (UTC)but hell. why not fuck it up more? why not go all the way? ]
Dawn, wait.
[he goes after her, grabbing at her arm.]
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 07:05 am (UTC)What?
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 07:07 am (UTC)[he lets go of her arm, crossing his arms instead. it's the only protection he can manage right now. ]
I don't mean to be an asshole.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 07:20 am (UTC)[She says gently.]
But it's obvious that you don't want to hang out with me so just be honest about it and I'll stop bugging you.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 07:30 am (UTC)[he shakes his head, looking away, fingers curling hard into his arms.]
I like hanging out with you. I like hanging out with you a lot.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 07:37 am (UTC)So...okay, then did I do something that made you uncomfortable? Because it suddenly feels awkward between us.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 07:44 am (UTC)[and he didn't mean to make her feel bad about it, but of course he did. of course.]
But I don't want you to worry about it, okay? It's totally not your fault and I'll get over it so it's no big deal.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 07:47 am (UTC)So what is it that you need to get over?
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 07:57 am (UTC)but of course he failed, and now he's stuck, and he doesn't really want to lie to her face. ]
You.
[he can feel his heart jump into his throat when he says it, and his stomach is all knots now. he doesn't even look at her. he can't, or he might burst out in fucking tears or something disgustingly embarrassing like that, and he's already at his limit.]
I like you. I like you a lot, like... I have feelings for you and I'm so fucking sorry. I know you're with Hank and you're older than me and so fucking far outta my league, which isn't even the point, but it doesn't matter, ok? I'm not gonna do anything or say anything and we can still just be friends, right? I swear to fucking god that's all I wanna be, okay?
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 08:14 am (UTC)Dawn can only stand there in silence for a moment while her brain tries to come to terms with what Jason just admitted, the more she thinks about it though the more it kind of makes sense and she suddenly feels like the worst person in the world because all this time she had just been trying to form a fun friendship with Jason and now she's worried that she somehow led him on.
She also feels vaguely annoyed at Dick because she knows he would probably say 'i told you so' if he found out about this, he even mentioned that she should be careful to not encourage Jason's flirtatious nature too much.]
Wow.
[She breathes, running a hand through her hair.]
I.... wasn't expecting that.
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 08:30 am (UTC)I know. I'm sorry. I wasn't gonna say anything and I really didn't want to, but you know me. I did a shitty job at not being a shitty person and now I fucked it all up.
Anyway that's all it is so don't think it's you, alright? I'm really grateful that you've been trying so hard with me and I just wanna say thanks. Thanks for trying. I'm gonna leave you the fuck alone now. Sorry.
[he keeps his arms crossed tight around himself as he moves past her quickly and practically bolts off to his room. he wonders if he can talk Dick into letting him go to Detroit with him cause he doesn't think he can stay here right now. he knows he should give Dawn some space.]
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 05:34 pm (UTC)[Is all she gets to say before he bolts from the kitchen towards his room and she swears under her breath and stands in the kitchen alone for a moment.
Jason.
Jason has feelings for her.
It seems so wild to her, especially because she was pretty sure it was Dick he had a crush on, but maybe it's both of them now. Then again, maybe it's not so bizarre once you think about it. There's not really a lot of them in this place and they see one another every day, sometimes in tight workout clothes, and it's not like she's some hideous old crone like she jokes about being.]
Hrm.
[She says and goes into the lower cupboard where she knows Donna has stashed a bottle of red wine, she then grabs two wine glasses and heads down to Jason's room. Because she'll be damned if she's gonna have this next conversation entirely sober.]
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 05:49 pm (UTC)it's fine. it's fine. he'll just stay away from her for a while and get over his stupid feelings and then maybe she'll feel comfortable enough to wanna be around him again, even if it won't be like before.
everything was so good with her and he fucked it all up. he's so angry at himself for telling her. he couldn't even handle keeping it to himself. he's such a piece of shit.
he grabs some of his clothes off the floor and shoves them into his bag before yanking his hoodie off his chair to pull it on. he knows Dick probably isn't even leaving tonight but he just wants to be ready for when he is. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-03-27 06:01 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:geee thanks dw, don't give me a notification or anything..... XD
From:oh wow, i havent gotten a single one either and they're not in my site inbox either D:
From:argh I hate it when it does this
From:haha good thing i've been keeping my threads open in my browser. so many tabs haha
From:hahaha I would say sorry but I love all our threads too much ;)
From:hahaha me toooo that's why i wanna be sure i have them all in front of me xD
From:awww <3 also? Jason's crush on Dawn is so adorable
From:it's terrible ;___; lol
From:noooo it's not terrible, it's sweet, angsty and interesting :)
From:it's terrible for his poor heart lol
From:awww Jason :(
From::(
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From: